I’ve been a mom for half a year!!!

First of all; Happy six months sweet Ashton!!! I seriously can not believe that half a year has gone by and I’ve been raising a newborn into a baby and that in another 6 months he will be one!! Yes I know that’s still a ways away BUT these 6 months have flown by and I’m assuming the next 6 will as well. I have grown and learned so much on my journey into motherhood, yes I was a step mom before but he entered my world at the ripe age of 3. In honor of his 6 months I thought a little post about what I’ve learned, struggled with and love about being a mom would be perfect as well as a little update as to how Ashton is doing. 

What I have learned is google is my worst enemy and best friend, I use that baby the second Ashton poops a different color or is extra fussy. This sometimes leads to me deciding he caught some horrible 1 in a million disease from Europe only to realize he has a fart stuck… curse you google. I learned that I can function on very little sleep and I have to thank my old broadcasting days for that. I learned that if I don’t pay attention I will go all day without eating which as a breastfeeding mom you can not do. I learned that if it’s a super cute outfit I need to snap a picture of it really quick because he will spit up on it and that my least favorite ones will never get thrown up on. I learned that Friends is the best show to watch during middle of the night or early morning feedings.

What I struggle with is knowing I’m a good mom and mistakes will happen. I struggle with being confident in my breastfeeding journey as well as making sure enough pumped milk is available. Even if I do the math of how many ounces we need for a day trip I always end up being wrong and having to pull out the hand pump or pull the car over and nurse. I struggle with getting myself ready every day because I’d rather him look cute than me. One big thing I struggle with is stress, I worry about the future, Eric, Ashton, Jordan, money, etc, more than I did prebaby. I struggle with finding the balance between mom life and small business life. I struggle with keeping a schedule and judgmental comments from fellow moms. 

What I love is that Ashton will laugh a different way for his dad than he does for me. I love that he mimics me daily now and that if there isn’t anything blocking him he will roll as far as he can. I love that he still only giggles in his sleep because when he’s awake it scares him. I love that despite the added weight, stretch marks and lack of makeup I feel more beautiful now than I ever have. I love that I get to bond with him through breastfeeding and realize that some moms would kill for this. I love that his dad works so hard so that I can be home with the kids. I love that this journey has been hard and despite all the struggles it’s been so unbelievably rewarding. I love that each day I know I have three boys who love me, count on me, need me and want me. Most of all I love being a mom. 

Okay enough about me lets talk about about Ashton!! We are 6 months strong breastfeeding, Eric and I decided that we would follow along with the old tradition and introduce food around 9-12 months like my mother did with my sister and I. With that being said he’s way more active while nursing now, some times I find both his feet in my face and him doing a handstand on me while gulping down his milk. He also really enjoys “talking” to me or smiling while eating so I know I must be producing some good stuff for him. Admittedly when I can tell he’s almost full I like to tickle his side and make little noises because he will then giggle and smile spilling milk all over him and me. As I mentioned above he’s a roller (We are sure he will be crawling any day now) I now have pillows and blankets all over our apartment floor to help guide him away from things like his daddy’s computer and the corner of chair legs. He is obsessed with his Sophie giraffe to the point that if I leave it at home I instantly regret it. He also finds it amusing to throw her when he’s riding in the car but becomes very upset that I don’t pull over immediately to retrieve it for him. He is still taking after me in the small baby department and so far seems to be growing at the same pace I did. Ashton is also at that fun and exhausting stage where he needs entertained but doesn’t know how to entertain himself yet so we have started doing walks and are going to try reading again. He still has a love hate relationship with baths and recently I found out that he likes wearing hats and if I take them off his world is destroyed. (sorry sweetie) Some days I get so excited to see him grow and meet new milestones until I realize that these first are also his lasts first. He will never learn these exciting things again, those days I hold him a little longer and cover his face with kisses. He still sleeps through the night and wakes around 5 am, naps can only happen in his swing and I’m not looking forward to the day he can no longer swing in it. He is still working on 4 teeth and hates anything cold on them. He also loves looking at himself in the mirror and even turns around to look for the other baby. I can not wait to see what the next 6 months have in store for us. 

Ashton’s monthly photos from 1 month to now.